this from one of my favorite bloggers. Oh, and this is a good one too. I laughed at the time because sometimes we all feel these things, but can't usually admit it. In the spirit of oversharing on the internet, here are some of my confessions. Just want to point out that I LOVE my children and LOVE being a mom, but sometimes reality isn't as pretty as it looks.
-At any given moment I have either food or a bodily fluid on my clothing and possibly in my hair. Sometimes I change clothes, most of the time I just wipe it off.
-Most days I have 2 choices of snacks in my purse. Not the diaper bag, just my purse.
-Often it's 3 days before I wash my hair. At 9:30pm, I'm just not in the mood to blowdry and flatiron. God forbid I have time to shower in the morning or before 9:30pm.
-Sometimes I lock myself in the bathroom for a few minutes because toddlers are just too much. Sometimes I need a timeout.
-Even though I laugh it off when someone asks me "are you pregnant?", it kills me and makes me want to buy a girdle. Isn't it safe to assume that the tummy is hanging around from the 4 month old I have and that I'm not totally freaking insane and pregnant?
-My cookies are store bought, usually the break and bake variety. Sending those bad boys to the school Halloween party tomorrow.
-Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is a great babysitter. I try not to over do it, but sometimes it happens. The good news is that it's nice to cuddle while watching it.
-I HATE pumping. I LOVE providing 100% breastmilk for my daughter, but I want to burn this stupid pump every time I look at it. I might just go Office Space on that thing when I'm done with it. Who has a baseball bat I can use?
-Sometimes I feel resentful of stay at home moms. There are days when I wish I was one. But deep down, I'm most happy being a working mom. But sometimes I think that stay at home moms got a sweet deal. We all know the grass isn't greener, it's just a different patch of grass.
-I make my kids Halloween costumes. Not because I'm trying to be some sort of Pintrest overachiever, but because it makes them special to me. My mom always made mine, and I have such wonderful memories of it. Am I making them to create new memories with my kids or doing it because it's special to me? Who knows.
-I have an awesome husband. He is incredibly supportive, and more than pulls his weight at work and at home. He's usually the one telling me what needs to be done around the house, and he vacuums and handles the laundry. But sometimes when I see him relaxing and watching tv at night and I know I won't sit down for at least another hour I feel a pang of resentment. Good thing I can easily remember how hard he works for our family.
-I dream of attending a yoga class again. Right now that just doesn't work into anyone's schedule so I settle for stretching in my bedroom at night.
-I'm working on letting go of things and not being the martyr. I think inherantly moms are martyrs, but let's face it, that doesn't make for a happy household. I'm still a work in progress.
-Sometimes I really wish that I had a relative around the corner that I could drop the kids off with for a few hours. So I could go to the gym/grocery store/date with my husband/peace and quiet. But we don't, and that's a choice that we made to live far away from our families. But I tell you what, sometimes I want to smack the people that have this help and still complain about never having a minute alone. I know, judgy wudgy was a bear. It still pisses me off.
Do you have any confessions that you'd like to share?
Sunday, October 13, 2013
In constant motion, wearing mommy's shoes and a blanket scarf
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Every room in our house is decorated. Every room except for...our bedroom. Our bedroom is bland. We've got pictures of the kids up, and a mishmash of furniture. The dresser is always a little cluttered, and the bed is never made with the "fancy" pillows. Our bedroom is our safe haven. Our most comfortable room. Sure it won't always be perfect, and that's ok, but it needed a little bit of a facelift.
We took a trip to Joann Fabric on Brandon's day off and picked out 3 fabrics. Off to Michaels for frames. I decided on shadow boxes to add a little more dimension, and the ones we picked were even buy one get one free! Score!
The how to:
1. Iron your fabrics and lay them down with back side up
2. Use the back of the frame as a guide for the fabric. Pay attention to the direction of the pattern. Make sure you're happy with which way it's going. Lightly trace the template.
3. Cut the fabric with an inch or so to spare for folding.
4. Wrap the fabric around the back and tape. Note: this was my first one and it wasn't very pretty. But hey, it's the backside, so it didn't have to be!
5. Hang them all up (or in my case, enlist your husband).
It's amazing how much it brightened up our room. Those frames have put a smile on both of our faces already. Next up, window treatments!
Sunday, August 4, 2013
*disclaimer: if you are interested in my experiences with nursing, feel free to read. If this does not interest you at all, please visit us on our next post*
In honor of National Breastfeeding Week, I thought I would share about my experiences.
Another disclaimer: there is no right/wrong with breast milk/pumping/nursing/formula. Each experience is special in it's own way, and families need to make the best decision that they can for their family.
In the interest of not making the.longest.post.ever, this will be a multiple posting subject. Let's start with my first baby experience.
When I was pregnant with Grayson, I knew that I wanted to nurse. I knew very little about it, so I took a class through the hospital. It was lead by a well known lactation consultant (LC), and I ended up meeting a good friend in the class. The class was informative, but in my opinion a little misleading. I think there is a stigma in the community these days that breastfeeding is natural and should never be painful. Well, in my case, it wasn't really either. As prepared as I was going into it, the first time that Grayson went to the breast was both unatural and uncomfortable. Suddenly the nurse had him in position and was grabbing my breast and shoving it into his mouth. I am very grateful for the help (I had no idea what to do), but it still wasn't the slightest bit pleasant. We fumbled through the first few hours of feedings, and I was quickly in a lot of pain. Feeling 100% first time mom anxiety, I had no idea what to do. Enter my uber-supportive mom. She was and is very committed to not necessarily me breastfeeding, but committed to helping me with whatever decision I made. She got the nurse and asked to see a LC while we were in the hospital. Quite frankly, she was just ok. She did help by giving me a nipple shield and a few tips, but I felt a bit like a number on her list. The problem was that my dear newborn baby boy was tucking his bottom lip under and that coupled with quite the sucker was making for a very bad latch. The nipple shield was a savior. It gave me relief and helped teach him how to latch properly. Life was ok again. Nipple shields are great, but the lesson that I learned was that they are meant to be a short term bandaid. The longer you use it, the more dependant you both become on it. The baby doesn't know how to latch without it, and since its not mouth to nipple, it can decrease milk supply. Fast forward 7 weeks and we were still on it. I had multiple shields, trying to make sure that I always had one with me, and constantly having to sanitize them. After some advice from my local La Leche Leauge (LLL), and just freaking relaxing about it, we stopped using it. One magical day my beautiful baby boy latched on without it.
I think that most moms have a love/hate relationship with the pump. I do not think that anyone actually likes the act of pumping, but you can't argue with the results. When Grayson was about a week old, I was desperate for a little extra sleep. Brandon and my mom went out to Babies r Us and bought a magical pump. This bag of fun was going to give me a little extra sleep at night, and give Brandon the opportunity to give Grayson a bottle. Should be simple, right? HA! I read the instructions, cleaned all the parts, and was ready to go. Except there was no milk. Pumping and pumping and pumping, and I was barely getting a few drops. I was making plenty, where was it all? Was the pump broken? Was I doing it wrong? Enter super helpful mom to the rescue. Reading the instructions, researching online, and even a call to Medela and we found the problem. The attachments come in various sizes, and I had the wrong one. Another trip to Babies r Us for additional parts, and we were good to go! A little while later, there was enough for a bottle! Success!
Working nursing moms:
Let's start with this statement. Being a working nursing mom is HARD. Trying to pump enough milk to provide for your baby is no easy feat. I was pumping a 5:00am, and trying to squeeze in 2-3 sessions while at work. Oh, and the pump room was far from awesome. I am very very grateful that my company provides a mothers room (side note, legally they have to), but it is very utilitarian. I think it used to be a storage closet along a very busy hallway. A 5'x5' room with a chair, a mini fridge, and a fluorescent light. Oh, and hearing everyone walking by and talking. But we do our best, and make the best if it. You soon make friends with the other moms to coordinate times, commiserate with, and share stories and advice. I got to know 2 other moms in there who became very good work friends. There are few things in life that make returning to work easier than another working nursing mom. They know what you're going through, and help you get through it together. But back to the working nursing mom. A few weeks after returning to work, I noticed that my supply was dropping. Suddenly I was getting ounces less a day. Fortunately I had a supply in the freezer that we could use on the days where I didn't get enough. Stress set in, and that only made things worse. The more you stress about your supply, the more supply issues you have. I was willing to do and try anything to help make more. The pills, the tea, the brewers yeast, you name it. Information and support from LLL helped, but ultimately there just wasn't enough.
Enter again supportive mom, armed with a can of formula. To say I was an emotional about all of this is an understatement. I felt all sorts of emotions. Even though I knew I wasn't, I felt like a failure. I was failing my child. Formula was not bad, but just a sign of my failure. That was a big pill to swallow. Looking back on it now, I know I did my very best, and that was a success. Slowly we began supplementing a bottle or so a day of formula in addition to all of the breastmilk that I was still giving him by pumping and nursing. Fortunately he tolerated it just fine, he never had a bad reaction. A family friend works as a nutritionalist for one of the formula companies, and gave us some samples and a lot of information about the different kinds, so that helped me feel a little more comfortable in understanding just what I was giving my child. I think that formula companies do a fabulous marketing job with samples, because most new moms stay loyal to whatever samples they get either from the hospital or in the mail. I will say this, if you are going to use formula, please get educated and don't just use what is free. Just because its free doesn't make it the best choice. If it is the best choice, great. But just do a little research too.
If you've met Grayson, you know that he is a very independent guy. He has been that way from the beginning, and he does things in his own time. Add weaning to this list. My nursing goal was 6 months. Wouldn't you know it that shortly after he turned 6 months, Grayson self weaned. What started as a strike quickly became apparent that he simply didn't want anything to do with it anymore. He was done, and wasn't going to be convinced otherwise. I was not ready yet, but I realized that my beautiful baby boy was, and I couldn't force something on him that he didn't want. Especially when I could give him what he wanted, a bottle. I still pumped and gave him as much breastmilk as I could, but a few weeks later, I decided to hang up the pump and become a full time formula family. This was a very emotional time for me since he decided, not me, but in the end it worked out just fine.
In the end, I'm happy with my breastfeeding journey with Grayson. He is a happy and healthy boy, and I'm a stronger mama for the experience. And I was much better armed for baby #2...but that's another post!
A few useful links:
Tools of the trade: